they say that 20 mins of creative writing a day improves your writing a hell lot.
well, here's mine.
i feel like i've been through a really bad break up.
how do you describe one??
well, i call it a break up when i can physically feel a wound festering at the location where my heart used to be. it's there 24/7, it hurts a hell lot, and nope it doesn't go away. oh yeah. and it scars.
at least with a bad break up you can call up allllll your best friends, drag them away from stuff they're supposed to do (ha, har-di ha) and torture their ears with every single detail of pre-break up notes and post-break up notes while making them buy you tub after tub of ice-cream.
it doesn't go that way.
cuz it's not a stupid ex-boyfriend.
it's an ex-bestfriend.
one that was with you all the way through high school's mean traps of thinking that you're gonna be somebody then sticking out a foot to trip you up on your face just to let you know that "nope, the world ain't fair and things are not gonna go your way", cried with you, laughed with you, shared secrets with you..
that friend was supposed to be with you all the way through your break ups and zits and experimenting with make up and bitching about the other girl and holding back tears when she's the bridesmaid when you get married.
and now she's the other girl.
i'm starting to hate watching gossip girl cuz i don't think that i'll have the relationship that serena and blair has. i cringe when i see them hugging each other and supporting each other mentally. i ask myself, "where are we? why aren't we here?"
im so very hurt. i regret everything.
and im not gonna finish this post.
